Monday, November 14, 2011

Mrs. Tina Harris...Pastor's wife of the week!


Husband’s Position- Pastor of North Central Baptist Church in Roy, Utah
How long have you been married? 10 years
How many children/grandchildren do you have? How old are they? At this point, God has not given us any children. We would love to have them, but I believe that if God wants us to have children, He can give them to us….whether I will give birth to them or adopt them or whatever. We are not seeking out anything as far as that goes at this point, but are willing to go through any doors God opens to us concerning children.
1.      Where/How did you meet your husband? My husband and I met in college. A friend introduced us and we became good friends. After about 3 months, he finally asked me on a date and we hit it off. We were married less than a year after we first met.
2.      When did you get saved? When I was 4 yrs. Old, my Jr. church teacher taught a lesson on Zacchaeus. When I went home that afternoon, I told my dad I wanted to get saved. He took his Bible and led me to the Lord.
3.      Can you share your testimony? When I was 14 yrs. Old, I surrendered to do whatever the Lord wanted me to do – except be a missionary. I was afraid God would send me to Africa and I didn’t want to go there. When I was 16, during a missions conference, I surrendered to do whatever the Lord wanted me to do, even if it was Africa. When I was dating my husband, he felt God leading him to start a church in Utah. When he asked if I would be willing to do that, I could easily say “yes”, because I had already surrendered to do “anything”!
4.      How long have you been in the ministry? 4 years
5.      How did you know the Lord wanted you in the ministry? Was it hard for you to submit to that or did you know 100% sure right away that this is what God wanted for your life? As I stated earlier, I was afraid if I surrendered to God, He would send me to the jungles of Africa with snakes and bugs….eeekk. After 2 years, I finally submitted to ANYTHING.
6.      How old were you when you your husband first held a position of leadership? 30
7.      And if you were young, did you have a hard time adjusting because of your age? Did you feel “ready” to be in that position? Did you feel you had a harder time being respected or taken seriously because of your age? I don’t know what you consider “young”. I like to think I am still “young”. When my husband first told me that God wanted him to start a church, I was 23 and I struggled with it during that time. I had a wonderful pastor’s wife when I was growing up and I felt that I would never be able to measure up to her. After much prayer, God showed me that He didn’t need me to be “my pastor’s wife”, He just needed me to be the best pastor’s wife that I could be 
8.  What would be the best thing you would tell a mom who is raising her children in the ministry? Don’t ever complain about the ministry in front of them. Make them part of the ministry with you and make sure that they know that they come before your ministry.
9.  Are you naturally a submissive person or do you sometimes have a hard time easily following your husband? I am not naturally submissive. I like to have everything planned out and have all the answers before I take my first step. It’s definitely hard to be that way in the ministry. I have to constantly tell myself that I don’t need all the answers, I just need to follow. Easier said than done, sometimes.
10.  What do you do to encourage your husband when he is discouraged with the work? God has given me a wonderful husband who very rarely gets discouraged. When he does, I remind him that God is in control and we don’t have to have all the answers, we just have to follow His leading.
11.  How do deal with any criticism toward your husband from others? Well, I beat them up of course….just kidding. It is always hard when someone is criticizing your husband. I try to give it to the Lord.
12.  How do you deal with personal criticisms? First, I get mad…..then I pray about it. It’s so hard to be pleasant and act like everything is ok when you know someone is talking badly about you. Over the years, I’ve use the “kill ‘em with kindness” method. If I have bad feelings toward someone or I know they do toward me, I go out of my way to do things for them…. Make them cookies, buy them a small gift. As I do that, God changes my heart toward them. Not an easy thing to do, but it works.
13.  Do you set aside date nights/days with your husband? Since my husband and I don’t have children, we get to do a lot of things together. Mondays is our day off, so we are usually together then, but we don’t have a specific time set aside for that at this point. It will change after we have kids.
14.  What is the biggest thing you have learned about being married to a man in the ministry? I think the biggest thing I’ve learned is that I have to share my husband. He will get calls in the middle of the night. Our plans will be cancelled from time to time. “People” are the ministry and you have to have a genuine love for people.
15.   What are some ways you protect your husband from “those” women in the church? As of yet, we haven’t had any of “those” woman to deal with. My husband is great about protecting himself and his testimony. He has a window in his office with blinds on it that he opens when he is meeting with a woman and he never meets with a woman if I am not at the church. We also openly show our people that we are “in love” and there is not room for anyone else in our marriage.
16.  Do you and your husband have devotion or prayer time together daily? Yes
17.  Do you have a hard time sharing your burdens with your husband in fear that it will discourage him? I don’t because he helps to keep me level headed. He seldom gets discouraged and always helps to make my burdens lighter.
18.  What do you do to encourage yourself in the Lord? I read in the Psalms every day. I also listen to good music often.
19.  What is your favorite Scripture? Ps 32:8  “I will instruct thee and teach thee in the way which thou shalt go: I will guide thee with mine eye.” I don’t have to have all the answers because God has promised to guide me if I keep my eyes on Him.
20.  Do you have a favorite song? “On the other side of the boat”. “On the other side of the boat, just a few feet away. The Lord filled their nets and gave them victory that day. So when you get discouraged, don’t you give up hope. For your victory may be just a few feet away on the other side of the boat.”
21.  What is your biggest struggle in the ministry? At this point, it is the busyness. I sometimes feel like I do everything. Especially when it comes to the nursery.
22.  Do you have find that you are not able to have close lady friends in your church? I do have ladies in the church that are my friends….but of course, there is no one that I can share everything with.
23.  When you are discouraged, do you feel like you can “show” that feeling to ladies in the church? Or, do you feel like you always have to portray the “perfect” happy Pastor’s wife? I try not to show when I am “down”, but I am by no means “perfect”. I think our ladies realize that I, too, am human and I sometimes struggle. I’m usually pretty good at hiding my feelings.
24.  Have you ever made a big mistake or offended someone, and if yes, how did you go about restoring that relationship? I recently showed my “un-perfectness” to a lady in the church. She caught me at a bad moment and I did not respond to her like I should have. I went to her and apologized.
25.  Do you have other lady ministry friends that you go to for counsel and “venting” purposes? I have pretty much always been a person that keeps things inside and works through them with prayer. I tend to be the “listening ear” and the “shoulder to cry on” for others, but there isn’t really anyone I go to when I need to “vent”. I do go to my Pastor’s wife for advice.
26.  Other than praying, what is the most encouraging thing ladies in the church can do for you? Pitch in and help. There have been times when I’m in the nursery for the 16th service in a row and one of my ladies will come in and tell me to go out to church and they will watch the nursery. That is such a blessing to me.
27.  What is your favorite way to serve the Lord in your church? My favorite thing is probably choir and special music.
28.  Do you currently have special Ladies Bible Study, meetings, or fellowships? We have a ladies meeting once a month.
29.  What ways to you encourage your ladies to get involved in the work of the church? We give out “opportunities to serve” slips once a year with all the ways people can get involved in the church. When we need a SS teacher or a meal cooked for someone, we can look through those slips to see what people would like to do that and then we can ask them to do something they “want” to do.
30.  What is the most important thing you want to pass down to your children? A servant’s heart
31.  In all of your busyness, how do you fit your personal time in with the Lord each day? I always do my devotions after my shower in the morning. It is part of my “getting ready time”.
32.  Out of all that you have learned being in the full time ministry, what is the most important thing you have learned? People, people, people….you have to care for and have a genuine love for people.
33.   How would you describe the “perfect” Pastor’s wife? A lady who is spiritual, friendly, willing to do anything that is needed of her, a helpmeet to her husband, and someone you can go to for advice.

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