As you know I am blessed with a fantastic husband! He is seriously amazing. He helps me do anything and everything....Well, Tuesday night he was playing basketball and he dislocated his knee and tore a tendon, which means he has not been able to do anything, literally! He cannot help carry the kidsaround or help get them in the car. He can't walk upstairs to our bedroom so he is currently sleeping on the couch. He has a super hard time going in a store because it is so hard for him to walk, even with the crutches. It takes him 5 minutes to get into the car, and just all of the little things are nearly impossible right now.
I am not trying to complain, even though I am complaining, lol, but just feeling very overwhelmed. Normally, these things wouldn't bother me, but being a 36+ week preggo mommy of 3 (who via the Dr is supposed to be getting lots of rest), I am having a slightly hard time adjusting to this.
I understand that some of you are military wives/mommies or single who do everything by yourself all of the time, but for me, a spoiled wife blessed with a hardworking and helpful husband, I am just worn out! Funny thing?? It has only been 3 days!!
Today we found out he has to have surgery next week, which means 6-8 weeks for recovery and physical therapy. Again, normally, not so bad, but all my mind can picture is me with a needy husband, a newborn, and a 1, 2, and 5 year old...I may possibly just lose all sanity.
Now, I do feel awful for him...this really isn't all about me, and I know that. I don't know how he'll be able to stand there and preach 4 times a week at our church! Plus, he is now the interim Pastor for a church 45 minutes away that we drive to after our own services on Sunday, which we are very excited about! But, I am just not thrilled with the timing of all of this!
It really makes me wonder why God doesn't allow us to schedule our trials? Maybe because I never would, haha. This has just been a crazy year for us. Neither of us have ever had any health problems or any kinds of injury, but all of the sudden we are breaking bones, having crazy pregnancies, and all of this other stuff....does that mean we are getting old? hmmmm....?
Anyways, I'd appreciate some prayers, especially for my husband. This is even harder on him, I think, because he is such a hard worker. He can't sit down for 5 minutes without getting up to do something. He feels so helpless and I hate that he feels that way. He is still amazing in every way to me, though <3
So, anyways, this is the end of depressing post, haha.
I will say one thing, though. I know that the Lord has a plan for our lives, and through these little trials He is sending our way, there is something He is trying to teach us. And obviously, I am not learning quickly enough because He is feeling the need to pile them up at once...saying, "Trust Me." "I will take care of this." "Give me your burdens." and for some reason, I feel the need to say "I do trust you, but I'll handle it my way"....So, tonight is the night I am giving it all back. I don't want to deal with any of it. I have no reason to worry about how I will handle the stresses of being a mommy of 4, because God is the one who gave me the 4! He is surely going to take care of my husband and He will give me the peace I need when I am discouraged that the laundry is piling up or when I just feel like I am not able to work at my full potential of wife & mommy....He knows. and knowing He knows, and that He planned it makes me feel good. It shows me that He isn't quite through working on me. He sees something that he can mold into a finer vessel for Him. I am SO not close to ever being perfect, but I know that if I allow Him to give me trials, and I allow Him to change me through those trials, I will become more and more like Him.
It makes me think of the children's song...
"He's still working on me, to make me what I ought to be!
It took him just a week to make the moon & stars
The sun and the earth and Jupiter & Mars.
How loving and patient He must be!
He's still working on me."
Amen. I am so glad He is!
Hang in there Barbie!!! A friend of mine had twin nine year olds, a two year old, and a newborn when her husband had shoulder surgery, rendering him useless for months. God got her through it, he will surely get you through this. :)
ReplyDeleteI'll be praying for you Barbie, If i was a tad bit closer I would come and help you lots. That cannot be easy. Soon though you all will be on the road to recovery and everything will be back to normal. Just take it a day at a time and God will get you though it. ((Hugs))
ReplyDeleteOh, Barbie! I am praying for you and Matt--you are at the top of my list for the entire month of June!! God has a purpose and a plan, and you just have to take it one day at a time. Like Eve, I would come help you in a heartbeat, but God will provide the support and encouragement you need at just the right time! Your husband listens to the LORD and he will know when to take a break, he just needs to do it. Maybe a revisit to O.T. times when the prophet would sit and the people would stand (or another variation of preaching and sitting down?!) It's okay to ask for help when you need it, and be willing to accept it when it's offered. BIG (((HUGS)))!!!
ReplyDeleteBarbie ditto to all comments already made!! I love you and as always, pray daily. I too would LOVE to help if only I lived closer!!! Rich is looking-up flights for me, as it is already time for my yearly visit!!! YEAH!!! Boy the price of Airlline tickets have really gone up!!! :( Anyway will let you know when/if I can get there and meanwhile I AM PRAYING for you all!! Hugs & Kisses to you and my beautiful grandbabies :)
ReplyDeleteDebbie