Mrs. Chris Ingram...Missionary Wife!

Husband’s Position- Missionary

How long have you been married? 30 years in November

How many children/grandchildren do you have? 4 children and 7 grand childrenHow old are they? kids are all adults and grands range from 15 to 4

What field are you and your husband in/ going to? to the gypsies in Eastern Europe; will be living in Croatia

1. When/Where did you meet your husband? We met at our home church, Trinity Baptist Church in Arlington, TX
2. When did you get saved? My Sunday School teacher led me to the Lord when I was six years old.  She happened to be a missionary wife home on furlough.
3. Can you share your testimony? My mother was divorced and remarried when I was young.  The pastor that married them was an independent Baptist pastor.  After they got married we started going to the church.  My mother and new father were both saved before they married.  Within a few months of going to church I quickly learned that even at my age that I was a sinner that needed to be saved.  One Sunday morning I walked down the aisle and my Sunday School teacher led me to the Lord.  I was baptized that night.
4. How long have you been in the ministry? Since 1982.
5. Did you feel the same call as your husband to that specific location, or did you just feel the call to follow your husband? I felt the Lord calling me to the mission field when I was in high school. But I rebelled after I watched my mother die from a brain tumor.  But the Lord was not going to let me get away that easy.  Through many years of fighting Him, I surrendered.  Literally.  I told the Lord that I give up.  And right after that He put my future husband in my path. 
6. How long did you/ have you been traveling on deputation? We came off the mission field several years ago because of my health and family problems.  We surrerendered to go back this past February.  My husband has been on furlough since October.
7. What is the hardest thing about being on deputation? For me the hardest thing is being away from my grandchildren. (Sorry kids!)
8. What do enjoy the most about being on deputation? When we had the children it was being able to take them all over the United States and seeing so many sites. 
9. How do/did you keep your children excited about being a “missionary” with constant travel and being in church all of the time? We were always showing them how the Lord was working in our lives as we traveled.  They could watch how He always provided when we needed.
10. Do/Did you feel the burden of having well behaved children at all times? Any parent wants their children to be well behaved at all times, but that is not always possible.  That 'ole depraved nature always pops out at the most inoportune time in kids. But we all do our best to teach them.
11. What is the most encouraging thing that a Pastor’s wife could do or say to you regarding your children?. I guess is that the can see that we have taught our children how to behave and to also have their own standards. 
12. Do you always have the option of a Nursery in churches or do you sometimes have to take children who are not ready yet into services? I was fortunate to always have a nursery where we were. And for those churches where there is no nursery, do you wish they would make a special exception for your family while you are there? That would always be nice, but I would never expect it.  We would do the best we could.  It would not make me feel out of place to take a child out of the services.  That is just the same as is expected of any church member.
13. What is the best thing (other than prayer) that a church can do for your family or give to your family? Friendship and love
14. What are some things that churches do for you that may not be a help to you? We have been put into to church members homes that obviously did not like children and that caused inconvenience.  But there really has not been anything that I comes to mind.
15. Do you prefer to stay in a hotel, mission’s apartment, or the home of a church member? For me, when we had children a mission apartment was always wonderful.  But as we have gotten older staying in a home is nice.  I have developed several very special friendships from staying in homes.
16. What is the best thing a Pastor’s Wife can do to make you feel comfortable in her church? Just to show kindness goes a very long ways.  I have actually been in churches that I never learned who the pastor's wife was.  A willingness to help you with you children, especially if you have several.
17. What is the best thing that the ladies of the church can do for you? Talk to you.  Start up a conversation.  Not necessarily always about the mission field.  Just normal women and mom things.
18. Do you ever feel that you have to be “fake” at a new church to be accepted as a missionary? (For instance, do you feel the need to always smile, be social, and be positive about every aspect of your ministry and deputation) When I was younger and new in the ministry I felt I had to be perfect.  Just be yourself.  People can always tell when you are being fake.  When talking about your ministry and being on deputation, you can be honest.  It is not always easy, but it just how you talk about it.  You don't want people to feel sorry for you, you want them to feel your burden.
19. What kind of church makes you “feel at home”? Friendly, outgoing and talkative.  I enjoy it when the ladies talk to me, but what impresses me the most is when the teenagers come and talk.
20. Who are your best friends and what do they do that encourages you? I think my best friends are my two sisters.  One is also in the ministry.  She is a pastor's wife.  They allow me to vent when I need to.  If my husband and I are not on the same page (nice way of saying having an argument) I know that my sisters will let me vent and it is not going to be told all over the church.  They can be honest with me and tell me get off my soapbox or stop having a pity party for myself.  But most of all, I know that they are praying for me daily.  Sometimes hourly when needed.
21. Any “horror “stories you’d like to share? Well.........that could be opening a can of worms.   :0)  Let me see.  How about our family of six (youngest age 4 and a boy) staying in a home.  The lady did not like kids and her living room was completely white and glass furniture..  Including white shag carpet.  Needless to say, I was in our bedroom a lot with all for children because I was afraid of a disaster.
22. What has been the biggest blessing so far about being “on the road”? To me that was being able to share with our family how God provides.  Over and over we watched Him perform those miracles that people say never happen anymore. 
23. Do you ever get worried that your children will resent the ministry and the fact that you took them from America, away from their family and friends? There is always that possibility.  All we can do is our best, allow them to help as much in the ministry as possible, and pray, pray, pray.
24. What are/were your biggest fears and challenges about raising your children in a different culture? We would us it a learning tool to teaching them (and ourselves)the differences between our culture and other countries.  It also taught our children to love our own country.
25. How do you manage the lonely times (holidays, etc) without your family and friends in the States? We would try to celebrate in the same way as if we were in the states.  I tried to always make sure that I would bring something for each holiday to put up in our home.  And we started making new traditions.  In fact, we started a new tradition here in the states.  On New Years Day, I would make an full Romanian meal for the family.  It is something that we look forward to every year. 
26. What do you do to encourage yourself in the Lord? Of course Bible reading.  But I sing a lot.  It soothes my heart to hear hymns. 
27. Do you have a hard time sharing your burdens with your husband for fear of discouraging him?. I used to feel that way years before.  But I began to carry burdens thinking I was protecting my husband.  But after we talked one time he taught me that I was trying to carry burdens that were really something that he should be handling.  Also, if we do not share our burdens with our husbands, how can he properly pray for us?
28. What do you do to encourage your husband? You would be surprised how by simple encouraging words.  Quite often he would go out to new villages on evangelistic trips.  I would try to put little notes in his shirt pockets or Bible.  Try to find new ways to encourage him. You would be surprised what really does encourage him.  I learned accidently one time when he was talking to another preacher about how when I would walk by him when he was at his desk working and just brush my hand across his shoulders as I walked by what a encouragement that was to him.  Who would have thought it???
29. What is your favorite Scripture? I Cor 15:10 - But by the grace of God I am what I am: and his grace which was bestowed upon me was not in vain; but I laboured more abundantly than they all: yet not I, but the grace of God which was with me.
30. What is your favorite song? It Is Well With My Soul
31. How do you fit in your personal time with the Lord each day? I try to start every morning.  But you never now what is going to happen.  I have the Bible on my phone.  So every spare minute I have I try to read or listen to the Bible when my devotional time gets interrupted.
32. What is the most important thing you have learned so far about being in the ministry? To be careful to get too busy doing the ministry.  When I do, I tend to start doing it in my power and not the Lord's.  We have to cherish that personal time with Him.  I know that it is not always possible, but just do our best.  And to constantly pray.
33. If you could give one piece of advice to a girl/young woman who is wanting to be the wife of a missionary, what would it be? As women, we want to claim him to be "all" ours.  We have to be willing to share him.  Of course, we should always want him to put God first before us.  Just stay yielded and die to self every morning. 
34. What is your favorite thing about the country you are in/are going to? It might sould corny, but my favorite thing is that it is the country God wants us to be in.  And that make it my favorite.
35. Are you able to have the same type of ladies' ministries where you are serving as you could have in the states? When we were in Romania it was not possible to have the same type of ladies ministries that we have here.  When working with gypsy women it is a whole different culture.  Most of the women were bought as young ladies and even teenage girls.  They are just property.  They are not allowed to go to school.  The men want to keep them uneducated and always pregnant.  They want their women to be dependent on them. 
36. Did/Do you have to learn a new language? And if yes, how was it? Did you catch on quickly? Yes, we learned Romanian.  Even though the gypsies spoke the own language, they also spoke Romanian.  The last few years we were learning their language.  For me learning another language was difficult because at the time I was home schooling four children.  I was not able to get out as much to practice the language with people.  I learned the language almost perfectly on paper and reading but speaking was difficult for me.  After the children were gone was when I was able to learn better.
37. What is the hardest thing about being in another country? I was always afraid of breaking one of the laws that I did not know.  Or do a cultural mistake. 
38. How have you had to adapt to the culture where you are serving? Food? Clothing? I had to be careful how I acted and interacted with my husband in public.  Because women were second class citizens then.  When it came to food I had to adapt the "don't ask" policy.  Sometimes it was better not to know what I was eating.  Working with the gypsy women, clothing was not much of a problem.  They were required to be covered from head to toe, including the head. 
39. What are some ways you keep in contact with your family and friends that are across the world? The first few years were very difficult.  There were no computers.  The only way was to communicate was by snail mail and phones.  And then it was between $2-4 per minute to call.  So we did not call the states very often.  Now, there is no problem at all.  With computers you can do almost anything type of communicating.  Anything from email to Skype.
40. Do you feel "home" where God has called you?  We have been away from the mission field for several years.  Even though we knew this was where God wanted us at this time, both my husband's and my heart never left Romania.  We are so anxious to get back to the mission field!!!